Speech Codes Theory

Speech Codes Theory

Example: A Group's Slang Terminology

Remember People Might Not Understand Your Speech Code

The example of a group's slang terminology supports Speech Codes Theory. A speech code is a specific language used by small social groups to convey information in non traditional ways. It is important to note that each small social group has their own distinct language they use. For example, basketball players say, "He just got baptized" or "He got postered" when it comes to a guy getting dunked on hard by another player. They also use phrases that only another basketball player other athletes might pick up on like, "All day, all ball, shut down, or hack-a-shaq." Baseball players say words or phrases like, "backstop, five tool player, hot corner, go yonder, got heem, hit the gap, come on babe, dip, here we go kid, etc.." There are hundreds of slang words and phrases that baseball players use, but I wanted to keep them short and sweet. Football players use words or phrases like, "three and out, ice the kicker, the trenches, being a student of the game, sack, etc.." The point I am making is that social groups like sports teams, theatre students, student council, etc... all have words or phrases that make since to them, but do not make sense to other people hearing them. That is what the Speech Codes Theory is about.

I believe this theory is important for others to understand. Seeing as I played 4 sports in high school and my whole life (baseball, football, basketball, and soccer), I understand a lot of the slang in sports. However, I do not understand the speech codes of politicians, drama people, and journalists. Simply put, I need to remember who I am talking to when it comes to using the speech codes I have developed. If I am talking with people who don't know a thing about sports, I probably shouldn't use my sports speech code. I believe this theory will help me out tremendously in my communication skills. This is because it has taught me that not everyone understands what I am saying when I am talking about certain subjects. Some people have never heard of the words or phrases I say and I need to realize that before I start using them. I need to be able to communicate to everyone in a way that they will understand. Some people who have played sports or know the terminology will be easier to talk to because I know the speech code and so do they. Other times, I might be speaking with someone who has done nothing but drama or theatre productions their whole life. That person and myself would have a very difficult time communicating if they used their speech code and I used mine. It would be like me going to Mexico and trying to talk to someone who doesn't know a word of English. There would be a huge communication breakdown. At the end of the day, I need to pay close attention to who my audience will be or just the single person I will be talking with. I need to remember that not everyone understands my social class's speech codes. Because of this, I need to work on broadening my vocabulary as well as trying to learn other speech codes (music, theatre, art, politics, etc...) in order to successfully communicate with multiple people from multiple social groups.

Genderlect Styles

Genderlect Styles

Example: Blue & Pink Phones & Hearing Aids

Are You Playing Tug of War In Your Communication?

The example of blue and pink phones and hear aids supports the Genderlect Styles. Genderlect is defined as a term suggesting that masculine and feminine styles of discourse are best viewed as two distinct cultural dialects. In this theory, Tannen describes the differences between how men and women communicate. Men tend to switch topics a lot (love to talk about sports) and prefer to accomplish ideas and move on. Women like face-to-face time and enjoy talking about just one topic. Men tend to be quiet in relationships while women are wordier. Men tell more stories than women, jokes elevate their ego, and they tell more stories about themselves. Meanwhile, women just like to talk about others. Those differences between men and women represent the blue and pink phones. This is because men and women communicate differently. The blue phone represents how the men communicate and the pink phone represents how women communicate. When it comes to listening, men and women differ as well. This can be represented with the blue hearing aid for men and the pink hearing aid for women. Men want rapid fire conversations, while women like to add agreement terms into the conversation like ("OK" "Uh-huh" "right" and "mmmhmmm"). The differences in communication (talking and listening) between men and women can cause tension and a tug or war like mentality. Personally, I believe that men and women can learn from one another when it comes to their communication styles. Quiet frankly, if men and women don't try to understand how the other communicates, their relationship is doomed and will not be very successful.

This might be one of the most important theories for myself to understand out of all the theories discussed this semester. This is because communicating man to man or women to women is always easy. Why? The answer is simple, because we understand how the other talks and listens. When it comes to communicating with the opposite sex, men just say, "Women are complicated" and women just say, "Men are weird." Both of these statements have truth to them, but I have come to realize that the problem (I am guilty of this too) is that men and women don't take the time to understand how the other communicates. They try to use a blue phone to talk to a pink hearing aid and vice versa. It wont work!! This theory has opened my eyes to the main differences between how a man talks and listens compared to how a woman talks and listens. I will make sure to spend time talking about 1 topic thoroughly with women and not try to bounce around subjects. I will also attempt to talk a little less about sports and don't use sports analogies all the time. I will make a goal to listen more carefully to the opposite sex when they are talking to me. I might even throw in some agreeing terms, so that they really believe that I am listening to them. Those goals I have set out for myself might seem impossible to some, but to me, I believe it will vastly improve my communication with women, so that we stop playing tug of war when it comes to communicating.

Cultural Approach to Organizations

Cultural Approach to Organizations

Example: An Organization or Group's Culture

Some of My Greatest Friends in the World

The example of an organization or group's culture supports the Cultural Approach to Organizations. This theory is all about how groups operate. In this theory, the group is in the middle of its life cycle as a group. In order to understand organizational culture, one must realize that the key is not to look at culture as part of an organization but to understand that an organization is a culture. Culture isn't a whole or undivided.    It is also important to remember that that an organization's culture is made up of stories, rites, and symbolism. This theory helps groups who have been together for a long time stay together by understanding how these groups operate and how they can keep the strong bonds they have developed so far. This was one of my favorite theories because it helped me get a better feel for how groups I have been involved in for awhile operate and how our rituals, stories, and metaphors keep us closer and make our culture different from other groups.

I see this theory playing out in my life every day based on the groups I am involved with that day. One of the groups is my friends from high school. There are about 10 of us that played sports together and we have continued to stay best friends while in college. We have certain rituals we are always doing, especially during the summer and baseball season. We also have so many stories because we have been together for so long. This theory has helped me understand my group of friends because it has opened my eyes to the culture we have. It is a culture that is very laid back, has a lot of inside jokes, is heavily involved with sports (baseball being #1), and always hanging out on breaks when all of us are home (especially over the summer). This theory has helped me realize our group is one of a kind and that no other group I am a part of will be able to communicate to each other like we do. Our group is at a point in time where we can communicate with one another and know exactly what the other is thinking or going to do without even saying anything. We are unique and I am so thankful that God has blessed me with these friends and allowed our group to stay so close together over the last 6 years.

In the end, this theory has made me realize that communicating between different groups is not an easy task. It is quite difficult because different groups have different stories, rituals, and metaphors that separate themselves from other groups. These three things help create the culture of the group. Each group or organization is a different culture. If you look at people from the Midwest, East Coast, West Coast, and the Deep South you can see that each acts and speaks differently than the other people group. This is because they all live in different cultures that make them unique from the other cultures out there. It is important to be understanding this point because it will help one communicate better with people living in different cultures than your own. One needs to be patient and understanding when communicating with another group because your stories, rituals, and metaphors might mean something completely different to the other groups stories, rituals, and metaphors. In the end, I enjoyed studying this theory and hope it helps others realize that culture is unique and special.

Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive Dissonance

Example: Experiment for a $1

Was it Worth it?

The example of the experiment for a $1 supports Cognitive Dissonance. First of all, what is cognitive dissonance? It is the inward struggle of avoiding unease or discord with ourselves. We trick ourselves into justifying our actions so that we don't look foolish in other people's eyes. An experiment was conducted with some students and they had to put a peg in a hole for a few hours. Afterwards, half were given $20 to tell the next person that it was fun and they will love the experiment and the other half were given only $1. At the end of the experiment, the people paid $20 were interviewed and asked if they would ever do the experiment again. They said, "It was really boring" and "No, don't want to do it again." However, the people paid $1 were interviewed and said, "It was fun" and  "I would do it again, yes." Why would someone say that putting a peg in a hole for hours was fun?! The reason is a lot more simpler than one would think. The people paid $1 wanted to avoid embarrassment because they didn't get $20 for putting pegs in a hole for hours. So, they lied and said it was fun and they would do it again. They justified their actions and lied to themselves/tricked themselves in order to be at peace and eliminate the internal discord. This experiment was a great way in order to show how cognitive dissonance works.

This theory has been one of my favorites so far, but also one of the theories I have struggled with the most. I have already seen it play out in my personal communication with others. For me, this theory is more of a struggle in my walk with God and communication with him, than it is communication with other people. Sadly, it involves me trying to eliminate the unease with myself internally by justifying my sinful actions. After I have sinned (lied, cheated, cussed, or had impure thoughts), I will try to justify them by looking around and saying to myself, "That person over there told worse lies, or drops f bombs all the time. I am a better Christian than them, so what I said or did is alright." That is one of the worst attitudes to have as a Christian. I know I need to ask God for forgiveness and ask him to help take away the thought to immediately justify my actions after I sin or do something wrong. Learning this theory and understanding it has helped me in my walk with Christ. It has helped me to realize when I am beginning to justify my actions in order to trick myself into thinking what I did was OK because someone else does worse things than me. This theory really opened my eyes and has helped me to really stop and think about what I am doing and what results will stem from my actions. I am grateful to have been able to study cognitive dissonance and see how it works. It has been a tremendous help with my communication with God. I know I will never be free from having some feeling of dissonance in my life, but understanding this theory and praying for God to help me see when I am beginning to justify my actions in order to eliminate the feeling of unease in my life will help my communication with him as well as my communication with others.

Elaboration Likelihood Model

Elaboration Likelihood Model

Example: Used Car Salesman

Should I Persuade Through the Central or Peripheral Route Today?

The example of a used care salesman supports the Elaboration Likelihood Model (ELM). ELM is a theory that is about persuasion. Specifically, it is about using two different kinds of strategies in order to persuade another person into thinking or doing what you want them to do. The first strategy is called the peripheral route. This involves using irrelevant cues to make the individual make a quick decision. The second strategy is called the central route. This involves using facts and statistical data to inform the individual before they make a decision. A used car salesman is a perfect example when thinking about ELM. They use these two types of persuasion strategies everyday when trying to sell cars. Most of the time they use the peripheral route because they can tell the customer things they want to hear about the car they are looking at. The used car salesmen can talk about sports, the weather, the customer's family, etc... when trying to sell the individual a car. He can even talk about the car itself, but not give actual data about it (say the color is cool looking, it goes really fast, and the girls/guys love it). The salesman is in essence distracting the customer from the reality of the car by telling him/her it looks great and will make you popular. A used car salesman can also use the central route when trying to sell a car to a customer. This is usually rare because most used car salesmen are shady and will tell you anything to make a sale, but some will tell you actual data about the car in order to persuade you into buying it. Examples of this factual data about the car would be: the year, model, how many miles, repairs it has had done, upgrades the previous owner put it, etc... A used car salesmen is a great example of how ELM works.

I have seen ELM play out many times in my life. I have taken the peripheral and central route when trying to persuade others to see the situation from my point of view. I remember when I had to persuade my parents to let me borrow their car for a month because gas was getting expensive. I started off the conversation by telling them how gas prices had risen over the course of two weeks and it was only going to get higher. Next, I explained that my Chevy truck only gets 12 miles per gallon. Third, I said that I was having to drive about 40 miles everyday for the entire month to go to work and a non-paid internship. Fourth, I told them that my internship cut about 20 hours of paid work and that I could not afford to drive all the way out to Peoria everyday with my truck. After breaking down the situation and using statistical data to voice my argument, I had successfully persuaded my parents, using the central route, into letting me borrow one of their cars for the month. I used the peripheral route just the other day when selling a customer a pair of sunglasses at work. Basically, I told him that the sunglasses were really cool, they looked great on him, all the girls would love them, and he should just buy them. He immediately said, "I will buy them." My use of irrelevant cues persuaded the kid to buy the sunglasses. All that said, I believe ELM is important for an individuals communication. Persuasion is very important in one's life because "everything is an argument." ELM gives you two options to persuade an individual. You can either give them factual data or irrelevant cues to get your point across. Being able to know when you need to choose one route over the other will take time and may not always be easy, but it will payoff in the end. Again, ELM and its involvement in persuasion makes it an important theory to get to know. Personally, there have been times in my life when I have needed to persuade others, but haven't known how to do to achieve success. This theory shows two different ways in order to successfully persuade another person or even groups of people. That is why I like this theory and believe it will help me with my personal communication skills. It gives me two different ways in which to persuade people. Not everyone can be persuaded by the same strategy or method. That is why we need to know different techniques or theories that explain how to persuade others. Being able to understand when to use a peripheral or central route might be hard now, but after practicing and studying different scenarios, one can become a great at persuasion.

Symbolic Convergence Theory

Symbolic Convergence Theory

Example: Groups You are In

Official Student Section of ACU: THE FIRE SQUAD

The example of the groups you are in supports the Symbolic Convergence Theory. When people form groups and get comfortable with one another they begin to dramatize and form close bonds.  Symbolic convergence is essentially group consciousness or group cohesiveness.  That said, forming a group and growing closer together through acts like dramatization and fantasy lead to that group cohesiveness or symbolic convergence.

I see and have seen the Symbolic Convergence Theory play out numerous times in my life.  Every sports team I've played has had that group cohesiveness.  Every student section I have been a part of has had that group cohesiveness.  Being able to bond as a group and feed off one another is what makes groups grow closer and tighter together.  That is why the teams I have played on over the years regarding sports have been so good and close.  We all formed bonds that will last a lifetime (especially my high school baseball team) and will have each other's back no matter what.  This theory will be very helpful to me in regards to my communication skills.  Knowing how groups bond together is essential for good communication.  This theory shows that once a group is formed members bond together through things like dramatization, fantasy, rhetoric vision, etc...  Being a part of groups like this has allowed me to see that symbolic convergence aids communicating with others.  If you have that group cohesiveness, communicating with others is much easier.  You don't have to be shy about sharing something or be self-consciousness about anything.  The group will love you for who you are and won't make fun of you.  You can be yourself and just relax.  That is something that I have learned from personal experience regarding symbolic convergence and the amazing groups I have joined.

Interactional View Theory

Interactional View Theory

Example: Each Family Member Takes on a Role That Serves the Status Quo

Problem, Enabler, Deny-er, Hero...Which One Are You?

The example of each family member taking a role that serves the status quo supports the Interactional View Theory.  Paul Watzlawick's goal for this theory was to gain insight into healthy communication by looking at dysfunctional families.  An important point to make is that every family in the world, whether rich or poor, small or big, miles apart or everyone under one roof has its problems that make it dysfunctional.  The roles in which each family member plays makes up the status quo of the family.  Another point to make is that each of us delegates a role (ourselves included) to the other family members.  The ironic part about doing that is that each of us serve different roles in the other's minds.  Usually if you believe another family member is the problem, they label you the problem in their labeling of the family roles.  Family is a very important!  Being able to communicate positively in a family is hard work, but we should always strive for excellence and limit the dysfunctional moments to a minimum.

While researching this theory I learned a lot of information about how families work and ways to change communication patterns that will allow for healthy communication to develop amongst family members.  The biggest thing I take away from the Interactional View Theory that will help improve my communication skills would be reframing myself and my role in my family.  I see myself as the hero a lot because I believe that I am better an what I really am.  That is a pride issue and pride is a huge factor in families.  Nobody wants to admit that they are the problem.  Instead, we (myself included) try to hide our flaws and imperfections by pushing the blame on others family members.  I have learned to reframe myself in a way that mirrors and reflects Biblical values and honors God.  This chapter was a good reminder to always remember to be that light shining for God.  I believe that if I work on reframing myself to look like this, my communication with my family will get better and our family communication as a whole will improve and be healthy.  After all, each family member has to admit that they have flaws (lose the pride) and work on reframing themselves in order for the entire to begin to have healthy communication.

Expectancy Violations Theory

Expectancy Violations Theory

Example: 4 Zones of Space

I'm Not Touching You....

The example of the four zones of space, thought up by Edward Hall, supports the Expectancy Violations Theory.  This is because the four zones each represent a distance of how comfortable people are within that space.  Depending how comfortable a person is within that space will result in an outcome that is expected or not expected.  Hall believed that an effective communicator will adjust their nonverbal behavior to fit the rules their partner has created in their zone.  Judee Burgoon thought that sometimes violating these zone rules (people's expectations) would be a good strategy to conformity because it would catch someone off guard.  The first zone is known as "Intimate Distance."  The distance is between 0-18 inches.  The second zone is known as "Personal Distance."  The distance is between 18 inches - 4 feet.  The third zone is known as "Social Distance."  The distance is between 4-10 feet.  The fourth zone is known as "Public Distance."  The distance is 10 feet and beyond.

I see these zones of space playing a key role in improving my communication.  I never realized that there was a theory out there that related to my "personal bubble."  Nobody likes their personal bubble to popped, but sometimes the unexpected behavior of someone can cause you to act in a way in which you never thought possible.  Knowing that people's bubbles are split into four spaces based off of certain distances is very helpful.  Having this knowledge will allow me to act in a way that respects people's bubbles.  By respecting the bubbles of others, I expect a positive outcome in my conversation with them.  There might be a situation where I have to go against the norm and violate a person's bubble in order to keep them on their toes and give them something unexpected in order to get a the result or reaction I am seeking.  Overall, this is a neat theory and am looking forward to see if people unexpectedly pop my bubble or keep their distance.

Social Penetration Theory

Social Penetration Theory

Example: Humans are like onions

Peelin' Back Those Layers

The example of humans being like onions supports the Social Penetration Theory.  This is because the definition of this theory states that "as relationships develop, communication moves from relatively shallow, non-intimate levels to deeper more personal ones."  So, as two or more people get to know each other, they begin to move from basic knowledge about what their favorite color is and how old they are to intimate topics like what they want to do with their life and what kind of person they would like to marry.  People peel back the outer layers of their person and slowly get to their heart like you would peel layers of an onion back to get to its core.  The onion analogy is also used in the movie Shrek.  It is a simple and easy way to remember what the Social Penetration Theory is about.

The example of an onion, in regards to the Social Penetration Theory, is a very helpful reminder when it comes to improving my communication skills.  I will think about it especially when it comes to meeting new people and starting new relationships.  It serves as a reminder that I shouldn't immediately tell people my life story in the first five minutes I meet them (don't worry I've never done that).  For starters, that creeps people out and they will think you are weird.  Second of all, people just don't do that.  I've never thought about this example or this theory before.  However, after reading and learning about it, I can see I've always put this example into practice even though I never knew I was doing it.  When I meet people for the first time, I share quick facts and non-personal information about me with them.  If I get comfortable with them and know we will be good friends, I share more personal information.  Overtime, I have met lifelong friends that I know I can share anything with them at any time.  I thank God he's blessed me with a solid group friends who can share everything with each other and know that we all have each other's backs.  An important point to make is that I feel like one can never peel back all the layers and get to the core of a person.  As human beings, we are always changing and are unpredictable.  That said, it is always an adventure when it come to relationships with people because you never know what kind of conversation you might have or how their personality might be changing (for good or bad).  In the end, and I've had many people tell me this because I like to talk seeing as I am really comfortable doing so, is that less is more.  People don't need to know or want to know everything about you the first time they meet you.  Take your time and enjoy getting to know new people because it will be an adventure!

A Little Country Communication

Music Relating to Communication

"The Only Way I Know (Feat. Luke Bryan & Eric Church)" by Jason Aldean

Another #1 Hit From Jason Aldean

As I have said in recent blog posts I am a country boy born and raised back in the Midwest.  I love my roots and it has shaped me into the man I am today.  That said, I always rock that country twang in my Chevy truck.  Music has a powerful and very unique way of communicating.  Every song hits a person in different ways.  That is why I love music so much!  I listen to all genres of music: country, alternative, pop, rock, Christian, rap, jazz, vocal, and so on.  However, I believe there is only one true genre of music and that is country!  Country music does something that no other genre can do and that is the ability to tell stories.  Country folks like me can relate to these lyrical stories because they tell of the world we live in.  Each one of us have lived out these lyrics in one way or another.  Whether it be going out to them honky tonks, taking a back road in your truck, casting a line out to fish, living in that small town, breaking up with a girlfriend, losing a loved one or dog, or just kicking back on a dirt road with friends; people relate to these lyrical stories.  Jason Aldean is one of my favorite country artists.  His song, "The Only Way I know," which features country super starts Luke Bryan and Eric Church, is one of my all time favorite country tunes.  I think it relates to communication in ways that many overlook or never thought could be possible.

"Well, I grew up in one of them old farm towns
Where they hit it hard 'til the sun goes down
Nobody really seemed to care
That we were living in the middle of nowhere
We just figured that’s how it was
And everybody else was just like us
Soaking in the rain baking in the sun
Don’t quit 'til the job gets done."

This first paragraph of the song shows one of the biggest misconceptions people make about communication itself.  That would be that people assume that everyone talks the same, their body language means the same thing, people have the same customs, etc...  In reality, communication is not the same to everyone.  One must be patient and understanding to gain a perspective on how people communicate because everyone is different and certain gestures or word phrases have different meanings between people.

"That’s the only way I know
Don’t stop 'til everything’s gone
Straight ahead, never turn round
Don’t back up, don’t back down
Full throttle, wide open
You get tired and you don’t show it
Dig a little deeper when you think you can’t dig no more
That’s the only way I know."

This is the chorus of the song and it is repeated many times throughout the song.  It is one of my favorite choruses in all the songs I have ever listened too!  This relates to communication because it talks about never giving up and doing all you can to make that connection with another person or group of people.  At times you might get tired and frustrated with another person for not understanding what you are trying to tell them, but don't show signs of weariness or anger.  Dig a little deeper and push through these bumps in the road because it will pay off.  There are no excuses!

"That old red dirt ‒ the first thing you learn
Is you don’t get nothing that you don’t earn
Humble pride that I grew up on
You find out just how bad you want it
Sun in our eyes backs to the fences
We didn’t know the odds were against us
Hit the wall smoking and spinning
Still wasn’t thinking ‘bout nothing but winning."

Luke Bryan sings these verses in the song.  I believe they speak about communication perfectly.  People do not get things handed to them.  You have to work hard and earn them.  Same is true for communication.  You can't expect to simply connect with someone without getting to know them first.  It takes hard work to have a successful communicating relationship with another person.  At times your back might be up against the fences and the odds will be against you, but   quitting is not in your vocabulary.  The only thing you can think about is successful communication with that other person.

"Maybe there’s another path that
Will get you there a little bit faster,
But I’m sticking with the one inside of me."

Eric Church sings the last part of this song before it ends with the chorus.  The lyrics he sings tie in well with communication.  He sings about there being other paths that might get you places quicker, but he is gonna stick with the one true path he's always known to be right.  In communication there might be shortcuts to having people understand you faster, but that doesn't mean that people will get a full understanding of what you are trying to say.  Like in life, taking shortcuts or the easy way out, will not always lead to success faster.  On a more spiritual level, this verse could also be interpreted as following Jesus as well.  Matthew 7:13-14 says, "You can enter God's kingdom only through the narrow gate.  The highway to hell is broad, and its gate is wide for the many who choose that way.  But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few ever find it."  Like the lyrics say, there are many paths that make things easier, but only one will lead to overall success.  The same is true to get to Heaven.  Believing in Jesus Christ as one's personal Lord and Savior is the only way to get Heaven and enjoy eternal life with God.  It isn't the easiest path and will be difficult, but you will be rewarded!

Left to Right: Eric Church, Jason Aldean, & Luke Bryan

After reading this, I hope that you have a different outlook on this song in regards to how it can relate to communication and even how it has a spiritual tie in as well.  Y'all still might not like country music as much as I do.  Actually, none of you will probably ever love country as much as I do because it's who I am, I live it every day, and it's the only way I know.  That said, I hope y'all learned a little something reading this post.  God bless y'all!