Social Penetration Theory

Social Penetration Theory

Example: Humans are like onions

Peelin' Back Those Layers

The example of humans being like onions supports the Social Penetration Theory.  This is because the definition of this theory states that "as relationships develop, communication moves from relatively shallow, non-intimate levels to deeper more personal ones."  So, as two or more people get to know each other, they begin to move from basic knowledge about what their favorite color is and how old they are to intimate topics like what they want to do with their life and what kind of person they would like to marry.  People peel back the outer layers of their person and slowly get to their heart like you would peel layers of an onion back to get to its core.  The onion analogy is also used in the movie Shrek.  It is a simple and easy way to remember what the Social Penetration Theory is about.

The example of an onion, in regards to the Social Penetration Theory, is a very helpful reminder when it comes to improving my communication skills.  I will think about it especially when it comes to meeting new people and starting new relationships.  It serves as a reminder that I shouldn't immediately tell people my life story in the first five minutes I meet them (don't worry I've never done that).  For starters, that creeps people out and they will think you are weird.  Second of all, people just don't do that.  I've never thought about this example or this theory before.  However, after reading and learning about it, I can see I've always put this example into practice even though I never knew I was doing it.  When I meet people for the first time, I share quick facts and non-personal information about me with them.  If I get comfortable with them and know we will be good friends, I share more personal information.  Overtime, I have met lifelong friends that I know I can share anything with them at any time.  I thank God he's blessed me with a solid group friends who can share everything with each other and know that we all have each other's backs.  An important point to make is that I feel like one can never peel back all the layers and get to the core of a person.  As human beings, we are always changing and are unpredictable.  That said, it is always an adventure when it come to relationships with people because you never know what kind of conversation you might have or how their personality might be changing (for good or bad).  In the end, and I've had many people tell me this because I like to talk seeing as I am really comfortable doing so, is that less is more.  People don't need to know or want to know everything about you the first time they meet you.  Take your time and enjoy getting to know new people because it will be an adventure!